Subject: Chat with Mirna Hariz
From: Mirna Hariz <mirnahariz@gmail.com>
To: barriticus@gmail.com

Mirna: omg she sent me more
Mirna: more and more
me: jesus
me: forward to me
Mirna: k
Mirna: she emailed your mom too
me: meh, these are boring
me: she seems to think she has absorbed the expertise of people to whom she is related or who have offered to fly her to NYC to fuck her
Mirna: that email she sent to your mom about 'why your family broke up' is really inappropriate
me: "and, like, I'm even going to get a masters or Ph.D. in clinical psych in the future"
Mirna: to tell a woman she barely knows why her family broke up
Mirna: lolz i know
Mirna: jesus christ why does she want me in the middle of this
Mirna: do you want to go to thailand?
Mirna: i'm behind you if you do
Mirna: the whores there are supposed to be amazing
Mirna: but otherwise this is a huge pain in the ass
me: nah
me: just ignore her
me: or something
me: I don't know
me: even my mom thinks she's crazy
Mirna: i'm going to write i'm really sorry you guys broke up
Mirna: but i think this is between you and barrett
me: I've never had my mom want me to break up with a chick before
Mirna: i'm so sorry you guys broke up :(
but i really think this is between you and barrett

Mirna: thats what i sent
me: k
me: damn bitch told my mom about the legal shit
me: about how I may end up facing conspiracy charges
me: it's unbelievable how much she fucking takes upon herself to decide what to say to who
me: she interrupted me in front of reporters a bunch of times
me: and explains to me that her opinions on internet issues are also sought out
me: even though she's a fucking art consultant
Mirna: she is apparently an expert on everything.
me: that's a convenient thing to be
me: I should date her
Mirna: is she calling you all the time?
Mirna: she's obvs not over it
me: nope, hasn't called me at all this time
me: just everyone else
Mirna: she's probably going to write a book about dating you
me: last time, when I threw her out, she sent me some messages to save face
Mirna: her emails are so long
me: this time she's saving face by "helping" me and also by putting up a bunch of facebook posts about how much fun she's having
me: Caleb called me up today
me: about this one
me: http://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=10100169568570260&id=23901593
me: most blatant post-break-up FB post ever
Mirna: im not friends with her
Mirna: i cant see it
me: "God dammit three guys have tried to kiss me in the past 36 hours. This is what I fucking get for going out and about with friends. Jesus."
Mirna: hahahahahahahahahaha
me: I mean
me: seriously
Mirna: she's not very bright
Mirna: obviously
Mirna: so transparent
Mirna: plus, its not as if that doesnt happen to every cute girl when she's out
Mirna: if you flirt with boys
Mirna: and seem like you're entertaining ideas of flying places with them
Mirna: or staying in hotels
Mirna: desperate.
me: You're just jealous because she knows guys who make six figures
me: that's difficult to accomplish for a girl, to have a finance guy try to fuck her
Mirna: its really really really hard
Mirna: you really gotta win those guys over
Mirna: they wont just fuck anyone
Mirna: jocks and finance dudes are really discriminate
Mirna: you have to have a vagina AND not be too fat
Mirna: thats really hard to find barrett
me: YOU'RE hard to find
Mirna: <3
me: How about I fly you down to Dallas
me: I have this friend, Lou Reese
me: he's rich
me: we'll run a train on you, it'll be whimsical
me: some Italian food
me: a little classical music
me: the GB
Mirna: awww
Mirna: you really know how to sweet talk a lady
me: KUNG-fu grip