by Darryl Ratcliff
Ive been frozen in the suburbs for 19 years
without a parka on. Slippin on black ice, all white,
all boy school; Goin between two worlds in one city,
without a snowmobile I was snowdriftin,
with friends chasin snowpowder,
brain freezing, trippin on ice, hangin down to our knees
wonderin why these white lines were makin nose bleeds?
And why Im behind this dumpster hidin from the police?
Shocked at the world behind popped collars and khakis.
Last month Giancarlo threw himself in front of a train.
Unable to flee suburban gated caged communities.
An atlas on piano he couldnt shrug the weight.
Didnt get to see 21, so we pour liquor,
gettin drunk tryin to make tears freeze-dry quicker.
I was trapped in a blizzard and thought he was still alive,
but its so cold in the snow you cant feel people dying
And even though my fingers are forever stuck to this pen,
my frost bitten hand cant ever write him back in.
Crazy to think last summer we were snowdriftin;
Goin to the conduit, mac, and west village,
with shauna, danny, cour, and nikki.
We were all so young, so talented, and so damn hungry
Our eyes so wide we couldnt watch TV.
My pens so charged I short circuited the electricity.
On frozen dark nights Ive taken the stars and replaced them with black ink.
They call me young Dante cause Ill show you the way,
And tell you bout them other things.
How I walked 8 blocks with a lonely lady who was an amputee,
but got her daughter into college cause of her infirmity.
Her story made me want to cry, it was beautiful to see
how her love for life transcended her vulnerability.
But I kept my face turned up, so hard and icy
Had to keep muggin them cause they keep muggin me.