I would just like it if you would listen more. It makes me sad when you don't. :(
I don't like telling people what to do. I don't want to *tell* you what to do. Last week when I was upset, er, afterward, I'd realized that a lot of why I was upset was bc I wished you would do certain things to help, but I never voiced it bc ppl usually just do whatever those things are of their own accord. I don't like telling people what to do, but I also don't really know how to ask for help. I didn't ask for anyone's help for four and a half years, and if no one did anything to help, I never expected them to ever help. I always did everything myself bc I gave up on trying to explain things to people who won't listen bc I dislike arguing bc theyd interpret it as a shot at their self-worth, and so the argument happens in defense of their ego.
And, so, I still don't know how to do it. I dont know how to ask for help when the person isnt listening to the actual, objective point that is completely removed from any subjectivity. I don't know how to communicate any of these things without you taking it as an insult and then defending yourself. It isn't about that. It isn't about character judgements. It isn't ever a criticism of your integrity, abilities or character. I just need you to help with certain things, and the fact that you may have not done them or have done something else does not change the fact that I think you are beautiful and amazing and want to spend the rest of my life with you. It is not meant to be insulting. I love you. I just have certain needs that need attention from you, just as you have certain needs that need attention from me. We're in this together.