me: what's shakin', yo? Selena: working on editing a story, what's up? me: what kind of story? me: speaking of which, New York Press ran my next column Selena: i read it me: they always get everyone's ethnic groups wrong in their illustrations Selena: you were very fucking BIG WORDY about sex! me: that's because I don't like writing about sex itself Selena: hahah i see that me: I like to make everything less fun Selena: you wrote about the technology that led you to get sex Selena: or at least to 3rd base Selena: how's tejas me: pretty sweet, I've got a pool Selena: nice work! me: also I'm being offered a huge amount of money me: by this producer out in LA Selena: whoa nice! Selena: for what? Selena: kill it, dude me: who wants to fund my project Selena: oh wow, congrats! me: and start a new cable news outlet me: yeah, it was kind of unexpected Selena: oh that's amazing me: you may recall me living on my friend's couch not too long ago Selena: yes. me: and owning a single mug me: and having you buy me vodka me: so, yeah, it's wacky me: this guy is wealthy himself and is about to raise like tens of millions of dollars Selena: this is amazing, i'm v proud of you me: good, you can let me touch your breasts again some time as a reward Selena: ahahahahahahhaha Selena: from texas? Selena: you must have go go gadget arms me: I remember them being large Selena: they're not huge or anything, christ me: anywho me: so, what were you writing? Selena: hahahahah well we'll talk when you get back to the NYC area, handy mc handerson Selena: oh for the NYP article Selena: just an edit me: handy mc handerson lol me: what's this one about? Selena: fucking a former orthodox jew me: lol Selena: yeahhhh Selena: it's pretty pathetic me: oh, so I was in Tyler, Texas, for a couple weeks to see my old friend who took a job as a producer at a news affiliate down there and also to cover sarah palin for Vanity Fair me: I changed my zip code me: on OK Cupid me: largely as an experiment me: my incompatability with the the local girls was such me: that my top match was a tranny me: who had moved there for some reason me: I tried to send him/her a message me: but her mailbox was filled with what I assume to be hate mail Selena: ohhhhh bummer hahahaha me: I would have gone for it me: and then written an article Selena: anything for a story? me: yeah, plus I don't give a fuck Selena: a date's a date me: I think I found the one me: http://www.okcupid.com/profile/HighPocketsinTX Selena: little old for you? me: the age is the only thing she has going for her me: I like older women Selena: ahahahah oh yeah me: the sad thing is that this is one of the more erudite profiles I see in Texas Selena: she doesn't seem entirely terrible me: there's like three references to Christianity in the first three paragraphs Selena: i skimmed that shit Selena: i don't want to look at a woman's profile when her eyes are too close together me: actually the women down here aren't that bad Selena: i can picture them being attractive in a big fake blonde sort of way me: it's just that they're so much cleverer on average in New York me: yeah, but I don't go for that Selena: i know you don't