| Subject: Chat with selenaleong@gmail.com |
| From: "selenaleong@gmail.com" <selenaleong@gmail.com> |
10:18 AM selenaleong: haha i didn't write for vice other than one book review and that was in like...2002.
10:20 AM me: well, that's still pretty damned good that you wrote for them when you were younger
10:21 AM it helps a lot for your query paragraph when e-mailing editors now
selenaleong: my friend was an editor there
"hi i'm a loser and wrote for vice magazine"
sorry i am just particularly hungover right now
10:22 AM and i am eating two of the world's smelliest foods in the office, much to the disdain of my coworkers, i'm sure.
me: what are those?
selenaleong: tuna salad
+ hardboiled eggs.
me: and why is your name non-existent on here?
selenaleong: what do you mean?
10:23 AM me: on this IM thing, and this started last night, your name doesn't appear
it's just empty
here
selenaleong: that's strange.
me: : tuna salad
+ hardboiled eggs.
me: and why is your name non-existent on here?
: what do you mean?
me: on this IM thing, and this
selenaleong: perhaps i am merely a ghost
me: merely?
that would be something
selenaleong: a figment of your imagination?
me: really something
10:24 AM that would make more sense
selenaleong: perception is reality!
me: so, today on the agenda
selenaleong: what have you slated
me: got more debates and conflicts than usual
selenaleong: oh goodie you can be quarrelsome for a living.
10:25 AM me: including one with a guy who used to be my ally against someone else
selenaleong: your enemy's enemy...
10:26 AM me: he's all uppity on me because I've been writing about how the 1999 Russian apartment bombings were clearly a false flag attack conducted by elements of Russian intelligence in conjunction with The Family, circle of insiders associated with Yeltsin's corrupt and broad-shouldered daughter
10:27 AM sorry, but she really does have a terrible boxy figure that's stereotypical
for Russia
anyway, this is not just my theory
10:28 AM it was also proclaimed by that former KGB agent who died of radioactive poisoning in Russia a few years back
plus other folks who were involved
10:29 AM and several think-tanks, strategic centers, etc.
as well as people who actually support Putin
but this fellow, Sergei Romanov, left some nonsense comment on my facebook page, of all places
taking issue with my assertions
10:30 AM now, these same assertions will appear in my upcoming second book
and were fact-checked
just like everything else in the book
the fact checkers didnt have a single question or objection about the evidence I present
because it's air-tight
10:32 AM selenaleong: as i am painfully hungover i will accept your word as bond.
me: very well
anyway, the point is
I don't fall for shit
like wacky conspiracy theorie
s
10:33 AM I write for Skeptic and Skeptical Inquirer, for instance,
selenaleong: i would not expect less from a man who is a professional atheist.
10:34 AM me: I've raised enough skeptical street cred to at least demand that someone go over the totality of my evidence before dismissing me as crazy
especially this guy whom I've linked to in the past
then there are like three or four pussy toy fascist douchebags who are happy to denounce me from afar but won't actually debate me
10:35 AM so I'm going to call them out today
one of them is supposed to be running a correction after having made an inaccurate attack on me
but then he didn't run the correction
10:37 AM selenaleong: reminder: never get into an intellectual debate w/ you.
me: I'm pretty vicious and systematic
10:38 AM some day
selenaleong: i will play subservient and nod
10:39 AM me: I'll tell you the story of how I totally ruined this one conservative blogger's emotional health
10:40 AM that was an unusual situation, though
so, how will your workday go?
what strange things will happen to you?
selenaleong: well. i am, as i previously mentioned, painfully, hatefully hungover
my intestines are tangled up like a bavarian pretzel
10:41 AM and i am nauseated as if it were my job
me: I see
selenaleong: and now i am nose deep in a spread sheet.
working on updating changes from a costing meeting
how's your thursday morning?
10:42 AM me: fun
I stayed up all night last night
broke off a date with some girl I was going to meet tonight
10:43 AM selenaleong: oh no, why did you do that?
me: wrote a blog post for True/Slant, which is sort of my homebase venue
and ran it on Daily Kos as well
several things
10:44 AM her voice irritates me (we talked on phone twice)
she seems kind of pushy
she wanted me to go to Manhattan
and also I'm kind of interested in you now
selenaleong: "kind of"
:)
me: oh, and also I'm going to be tired since I stayed up all night
10:45 AM I don't want to have to go to some "speakeasy" or whatever the fuck in the fucking pansy ass East Village
Speakeasy
what is that supposed to mean now?
10:46 AM plus I'm supposed to finish this column today for Skeptical Inquirer
and play this game Dwarf Fortress
which is incredible
selenaleong: haha did she want you to go to death & co
10:47 AM me: no idea, she just said there were a couple "speakeasies"
10:49 AM selenaleong: it's 2010
prohibition is long over
it's a fucking bar or a lounge, get real.
10:50 AM me: I know
selenaleong: hmm apparently you are not receiving my chats
me: no, I am
and your name came back
and it no longer says you're not online
selenaleong: oh google, you crazy bitch goddess
me: everything's fixed1!!!!1!!!1@!@
selenaleong: well hot snakes.
me: it's cool that you live on Grand
what intersection again?
10:53 AM selenaleong: roebling
driggs
it's a pretty happening block.
walter foods is there.
bruar falls
clems
10:54 AM trash bar, that bane of my existence
me: is that near union?
can't remember
selenaleong: yes it is
it's like...a five minute walk if even that
you're probably a fast walker. i mosey. i meander.
10:57 AM me: I'm actually supposed to write reviews of five restaurants on grand as a favor to the editor of bushwickbk.com. He's paying me for them, but I generally wouldn't do them
10:58 AM I just wanted to denounce this fucking bakery on Union and Grand
selenaleong: wait a second, restaurant reviews?
me: Roccio's
selenaleong: you should take ME with you
i am a fucking food freak :(
me: yeah, I used to do a lot of them when I was 18-22
yeah, was going to ask if you wanted to go
selenaleong: oh i don't eat pastries so the bakeries can go get fucked
i would LOVE to go.
like seriously that is my wet dream
me: no, see, the bakery I've been to already
it fucking sucks
10:59 AM they fuck up everything
selenaleong: service or product wise
me: I WILL LET THE PEOPLE KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT THIS EVIL BAKERY
both
fucking ruined a milk shake two nights ago
it's a Mexican bakery so a lot of the sweet breads suck anyway
11:00 AM selenaleong: serves you right for getting a milkshake at a MEXICAN BAKERY
me: I got a Cubn sandwich, meat was all dry
well
I figured
it's ucking icr crream
GOD DMANIT
my fucking laptop has this keyboard
which is not optimized to my hand
d
s
e'ka
11:01 AM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
selenaleong: are you having a tantrum
me: yes, I have an average of four or five a day now due to this new laptop
11:02 AM selenaleong: well.
dare i suggest you return it
and get yourself a mac or something
ha ha i am so heavily invested in the cult of the mac
11:04 AM me: we got the first mac when I was 2
learned how to read on it
11:06 AM selenaleong: so then
why not continue w/ that, line steve jobs' pockets with your hard earned cash.
11:07 AM but i am biased, every PC i've ever had has shit the proverbial bed
11:08 AM me: well, maybe next I get one
perhaps I'll get a used one relatively soon, have two
11:09 AM according to my calculations
11:11 AM ah, reading your article
I've never understood the big deal about anal
It's stupid
11:21 AM selenaleong: oh man are you reading that hahaha
uh i guess then you probably found the other thing i'm working on?
me: your blog?
yep
sending link to my friend as we speak
11:22 AM selenaleong: yikes.
me: but only because I'm supposed to keep him entertained at work and nothing interesting has happened in my game since a werewolf killed one of my dwarf's dogs an hour ago
selenaleong: hahaha well gee
if i can inspire him to masturbate then i guess my work is done?
11:23 AM me: I don't think he's the type to masturbate at work
selenaleong: you never know, i went through a phase where i did nothing BUT that.
me: he's almost certainly thinking about the game
11:24 AM selenaleong: hmm he's absorbed w/ an RPG? zzz
me: he's trying to write one
a programmer
works for a hedge fund now, trying to escaoe
escape
11:25 AM do you tend to refer to cocks as "glorious" often?
11:28 AM selenaleong: um. sometimes?
i mean if they are deserving of them
i like the word "glorious"
11:29 AM it conjures up images of...i don't know, something worthy of fanfare
11:30 AM me: huh, I just saw a reference to the panopticon two days ago
11:31 AM selenaleong: really
well as a former cultural studies major...
i'm into it
and foucault. obviously
is this stupid blog making you think differently of me
bc as i've written, it bums me out when people only see me as THAT person
me: nope
ever heard of the air loom gang?
11:32 AM selenaleong: no, what is that
me: crazy delusion on the part of this English fellow
in late 18th century
first recorded case of probable schizophrenic hypothesizing mind control from afar by use of machines
11:33 AM panopticon reminds me of it
11:35 AM selenaleong: i don't see the two being THAT related
but OK
11:36 AM me: they're not, just bizarre Victorian thingamajigs, one of which didn;t exist, the other one not existing for a different reason
11:37 AM selenaleong: i am feeling feeble minded today
so please excuse my inability to grasp what you're saying
it's like every concept is greased
me: I'll tone it down until you've recovered
WE SHOULD ENGAGE IN SEXUAL RELATIONS AT SOME POINT IN THE COURSE OF OUR BUDDING ROMANCE
11:38 AM " as we slumber like two stupid kittens."
pretty funny, actually
11:43 AM selenaleong: ha ha stop mocking my writing!
11:44 AM barrett are you a pervert, god i hope you are
11:47 AM me: I wasn't mocking it
yes, I'm a pervert
11:51 AM selenaleong: what self respecting man says he isn't.
though...i did date the world's nicest guy a couple years ago
totally marriage material
only...he was so NORMAL and NICE in bed. zzz
11:52 AM i mean he was tattooed and walked like a pit bull, you'd have thought he would be able to choke a bitch.
"darling i think you are barking up the wrong tree"
11:53 AM me: I'm confused as to why you gave the old man your panties but then weren't sure if you'd be willing to see him again
11:54 AM I'd be pretty confused if a girl went to the bathroom, took off her went panties, came back and handed them to me, and then was all like, "Well, I don't know if I like you enough to see you again.."
12:06 PM selenaleong: well i'm indecisive
i WANTED to like him.
i saw him a few times after that, but we never slept together (obviously because i didn't let myself get into a situation where that could arise, aka: public dates only)
12:07 PM me: right
12:08 PM did you go out to the comedy show with your friend's slave?
12:09 PM selenaleong: no
that fell through, though she keeps inviting me
what am i going to do w/ a tubby small wanged slave dude at a comedy show, enjoy him buying me drinks? zzz
12:10 PM i've never been particularly good when doted upon
me: well, you're in luck, then!
12:11 PM are there any pics of tits on your blog?
12:12 PM probably not
I lost interest, and pretty much admitted this to which he responded, "Well, I'm not interested anyway" and left.
lol, frat boy saying demonstrably untrue thing to save face
12:18 PM selenaleong: hahahah what?
sorry i was updating a line sheet
i have pics of my boobs on my computer at home. i am at work. it would probably not do to have them here.
12:20 PM oh. that quote. yeah the princeton frat boy, he was a snooze fest
12:52 PM selenaleong: are you still reading that crap