Subject: Chat with Catalina Saldaña
From: "Catalina Saldaña" <cat.salda@gmail.com>
To: barriticus@gmail.com

me: so, how are your bangs?
Catalina: they look great!
me: so everything worked out in the end
Catalina: yes
Catalina: should cut the rest of my hair while fucked up
me: of course
Catalina: they gave me nexium for my stomach pains
Catalina: which is bushit
Catalina: bullshit
Catalina: how are you?
me: good, editor of New York Observer wants me to come for a meeting next week
Catalina: sounds promising
Catalina: i found a great use for my old broken office phone i have not thrown out
me: how now?
Catalina: when i feel like slamming my new phone i just grab the old one and slam it
Catalina: it feels great
me: man, I haven't handled a slammable phone in years
Catalina: every phone is slammable
Catalina: thats why my razr is broken
Catalina: well actually it wasmore throwable
Catalina: i slammed/threw it against a wall
Catalina: then agains the ground
Catalina: i felt like stomping on it to
me: maybe you need something you can interact with in a hostile manner without breaking it
Catalina: but i showed a great deal of restraint
me: aside from that old phone
Catalina: no
Catalina: i like it when things break
me: a cat, maybe
Catalina: gives me satisfaction
me: you could scold it
Catalina: no, it the physical exertion and the sound of things breaking that gives me pleasure
Catalina: i thought about taking boxing before
Catalina: seriously did
Catalina: but im too poor and i wouldnt be breaking anything
me: WHO HAS HURT YOU SO
Catalina: no onw
Catalina: no one
me: I see
me: so if someone did, you'd smash everything
Catalina: probably
me: one could extrapolate
Catalina: i love that word!
Catalina: extrapolate
Catalina: extrapolate
me: yes, me too
Catalina: extrapolate
me: I use it a lot now in my work
Catalina: hey lets have a baby and name it extrapolate
me: and in casual conversation
me: no, "extrapolated"
me: insomuch as that it would be extrapolated from our genes
me: sort of
me: besides, I would prefer to name it "Demonstrable"
Catalina: just letting you know im not getting pregnant though
Catalina: not me
Catalina: i prefer extrapolated
me: good, you'd probably smash the damned fetus
me: would be a waste of fetus
Catalina: well i also have to drink and pop pills
Catalina: well need a surrogate
me: those are pretty expensive
Catalina: well make some damn money already
me: working on it
Catalina: are you the man in this relationship or not??
Catalina: provide!
me: if I am, we're in trouble
me: I MEAN YES
Catalina: thank you
me: ^____________^
me: KAWAII DESU
me: I mean, red meat
me: guns
Catalina: i dont know what devil language you're using
Catalina: but i dont like it
me: Jap talk
Catalina: hey!
Catalina: we both have negros
Catalina: we better make them work for us
me: mine's only half negro
me: well, she's been buying me a lot of stuff already
Catalina: she can carry our child then
me: yes, but we won't tell her