Subject: Chat with Caleb Pritchard
From: Caleb Pritchard <cpritchard2001@gmail.com>
To: barriticus@gmail.com

Caleb: Dude, I'd totally follow that link you sent me.
Caleb: But unfortunately, I seemed to have burned down my master's house.
me: It's good that you did
me: you're a hero
me: also
Caleb: My master's house has been burned down by mine own hand!!!
me: read this article by Stephen Glass that New Republic actually printed
Caleb: Mayhaps I already have.
Caleb: Mayhaps.
me: http://www.penenberg.com/popups/hack_heaven.html
me: read it again
Caleb: No, wait.
Caleb: No, I haven't.
me: it's just ridiculous
Caleb: I forgot who Stephen Glass was for a second.
Caleb: You mean Ryan Phillipe?
me: uh, yes
me: wait
me: no
Caleb: Isn't he that guy who burned down his master's house?
Caleb: Or one of those guys who did as such?
me: indeed
me: in 98
me: n Restil, a 15-year-old computer hacker who looks like an even more adolescent version of Bill Gates, is throwing a tantrum. "I want more money. I want a Miata. I want a trip to Disney World. I want X-Man comic [book] number one. I want a lifetime subscription to Playboy, and throw in Penthouse. Show me the money! Show me the money!" Over and over again, the boy, who is wearing a frayed Cal Ripken Jr. t-shirt, is shouting his demands. Across the table, executives from a California software firm called Jukt Micronics are listening--and trying ever so delicately to oblige. "Excuse me, sir," one of the suits says, tentatively, to the pimply teenager. "Excuse me. Pardon me for interrupting you, sir. We can arrange more money for you. Then, you can buy the [comic] book, and then, when you're of more, say, appropriate age, you can buy the car and pornographic magazines on your own."
me: And throw in Penthouse!
me: This is a real quote!
Caleb: ??
Caleb: http://www.rickperry.org/blog/new-television-ad-tenth-amendment
Caleb: "Our boy was definitely right."
me: The party scene at the end is best
Caleb: Of the Rick Perry commercial?
me: yes
me: of the rick perry commercial
me: sure, dude
Caleb: Kinky Friedman came by the studio today.
Caleb: He's running for the Demmycrat nomination for ag commissioner.
Caleb: All the little bumpkins were a'titter.
Caleb: a-titter?
Caleb: He muttered something funny about Rick Perry needing to get the lampshade off his head and retire already.
Caleb: That part made me chuckle.
me: he's so folksy!
Caleb: As far as jews go, he's startlingly underwhelming.
Caleb: I just don't understand it.
Caleb: I don't like it.
Caleb: Any more
Caleb: than you men.
me: Then, Ian stood on his chair and took a bow. He announced that he had hacked into a new company and frozen their bank account temporarily. "And now they're going to show me the money," he said, swirling his hips and shaking his fists. "I want a Miata. I want a trip to Disney World...."
Caleb: Hayden Christensen, I meant.
Caleb: Not Ryan Phillipe.
Caleb: Always get 'em confused....
Caleb: MY BAD, DAWG!!!
me: no problem!
Caleb: I should certainly hope not.
Caleb: Andrew Sullivan hired him onto _TNR_.
Caleb: Anti-semite.
me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UoH9zP_n_g0
me: dude
me: lol
Caleb: Bro.
Caleb: Howard Stern beat you to this by, like, 12 years.
Caleb: Anti-semite.
me: still funny
Caleb: I refuse to believe it.
Caleb: She's dead and you're dishonoring her memory.
Caleb: Her memory.
Caleb: Still.
Caleb: I'd like it better if there was a slide-whistle involved.
me: bitch got pwned
me: http://www.penenberg.com/jukt.html
Caleb: lol's.
Caleb: Netscape.
Caleb: Confusing times, to be sure.
Caleb: "j_u_k_t@yahoo.com"??
me: that's their corporate e-mail address
Caleb: Oh.
Caleb: That's their corporate e-mail address.
me: It's funded by the Jukt family
Caleb: Oh.
Caleb: The Jukt family.
Caleb: It's so obvious now.
Caleb: I mean.
Caleb: It was so obvious then.
Caleb: The Jukt family.
Caleb: Have you gone on your faggoty little gay dates yet, homo?
Caleb: Homo-girl-dater-queer-loafers?
me: yeah, got my sex on
Caleb: RIght on.
me: this chick from Trinidad
me: who writes for TED
me: and used to be a reporter
Caleb: TED?
me: look it up
Caleb: I don't have Internets access, bro.
me: fuck
Caleb: Technology, Entertainment, Design?
Caleb: If I may use my intuition, that is...
Caleb: Torrent Episode Blogger?
Caleb: 'Downloader', I should say.
Caleb: Because that would be 'TEB'.
Caleb: I had a beer at lunch today.
Caleb: You always know things about things I don't know about.
Caleb: I think that's so cool.
Caleb: You're so cool.
me: William Levantrosser, from Hofstra, wrote in, again pointing out Glass's numerous errors. Glass responded with an ad hominem attack on the school, snorting, "if you have to advertise in Times Square that you're in-the-loop, you're not."
me: ad hominem... snorting
Caleb: 2-0, Slovakia!!!
me: YES
Caleb: Did I tell you I'm moving to the Azalea District?
Caleb: Just like Hemingway.
Caleb: YouTube Christian video producer, Shockofgod, predicted the church burnings would have some tie to God haters.[3]
Caleb: Also:
Caleb: Spain, with its socialism and same-sex marriage, has unemployment of nearly 20% and has not yet won a single medal at the Winter Olympics.[4
Caleb: Conservapedia.
me: lol
me: http://www.slate.com/id/2159189/
me: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Whitney_Straight
me: http://www.uncp.edu/home/canada/work/markport/lit/litjour/spg2002/cooke.htm