Hi Barrett,

Thanks for your interest in our “gig”. And thank you for the samples. Our task is not to revise recipes, but to punch up catalog copy for a spice and specialty food company called Urban Accents. I’m on a tight deadline – staring at a semi-complete catalog layout with lack-luster headlines, subheads and product descriptions. What is your availability to give us a day or two of your expertise? And are you willing to stop by for a meeting?

 

Please feel free to call me at the number listed below to chat. The sooner the better.

 

Thank you,

 

 

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Howdy-

I understand that you're looking for someone to revise a series of recipes, and I'd like to be considered. I've done food writing for a number of outlets including AOL, The Onion A.V. Club, Chow Baby, Austin Monthly, and others, and my other freelance work has appeared in dozens of publications including humor mags like National Lampoon and McSweeneys.

I've pasted two recent samples below (probably not as quirky as you're looking for, though). Please take a look and let me know if you'd like to discuss this further.

Thanks,

Barrett Brown

Bonnell's Fine Texas Cuisine

 

Some chefs aim to take dishes and make them their own; Chef Jon Bonnell takes dishes and makes them Texan. The menu at Bonnell's Fine Texas Cuisine is largely made up of items that have been modified that they might better appeal to Texas dining sensibilities, and which are conjured up from ingredients hailing almost exclusively from the state and its shores. Among appetizers, the Texas Bruschetta makes good use of avocado-pecan relish, tortilla chips, and fire roasted salsa in addition to the more universal herbed goat cheese, while the Oysters Texasfeller proudly trace their parentage to the Gulf of Mexico. Among the entrees, one finds such things as the Buffalo Tenderloin - a pepper-encrusted buffalo filet that's pan-seared, topped with whiskey cream sauce, and served alongside asparagus and truffled pommes frites – and Elk Mini Tacos consisting of spicy elk meat served in corn shells and supplemented by pico de gallo, queso fresco, and the utterly improbable green chili cheese grits.

 

Craft

 

Like many great restaurants, Craft operates under a menu dictated largely by the earth's tilt. Whereas a visit on one particular month may find the diner confronted with guinea hen galantine or Muscovy duck served in cherry sauce, another visit could very well involve Nantucket Bay scallops with rhubard molasses or venison saddle served in huckleberry sauce. Whatever the season, though, fresh vegetables tend to play an unusually prominent role in most dishes – here, the intrepid diner will find Jerusalem artichokes, Colorado arrowhead spinach, baby bok choy, and shishito peppers along with a range of other, slightly less exotic greens. Craft also offers the sort of brunches one might rightfully expect from the sort of place that offers half a dozen varieties of oyster; the roasted Scottish salmon with picked beet puree and frisee competes with the humble biscuits and gravy for one's mid-morning attentions.

 

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