Experts are generally conflicted over whether or not Cindy McCain
should be deemed hot. While some cite evidence that she is tall with
blond hair and reasonably symmetrical facial features, which behavioral
scientists routinely cite as a characteristic often associated with
beauty among humans, others note that she is a pill-popping skank and
possibly some sort of vampire. The latter claim is controversial, as
most scientists do not believe in the existence vampires because
they're too scared to admit to themselves that vampires are everywhere.
"Vlah, vlah!" That's what vampires say; they go, "Vlah, vlah!"